Sunday, July 15, 2007
Too bad I just can't take my computer outside and type this. I'm in our kitchen and it's blistering hot. I've been on the web for about 15 minutes and I'm ready to type this and put my head in the freezer to cool down. This week I have my interview with Dell and needless to day I'm extremely nervous. I've been going to bed every night putting together sales pitches and trying to come up with something that's going to wow the people who I'm interviewing with. Nate said something today that just about knocked me off my rocker. He said, "Just give it to God." My thought was, "Easier said than done." After going to church though and hearing Tommy Oaks preach, who I totally love hearing, Nate's advice seems a little easier to handle. I know that I can give this over to God and that he will be there to guide me and give me words when I'm at a loss for them. I stress the later. I think I'm having such a hard time about this because I know that this is it. This is my chance to break through. But at the same time I'm thinking of not being there when my girls grow up and that breaks my heart. That's when I get chocked up. Makes me realize how many days I would have done things differently with them and enjoyed them a little more. Makes me promise myself that the days to come are going to be different because if I get this job our life is going to be a lot different. Life isn't easy and it's time to leave a job that's "safe" for me and move to one of uncertainty and new things. I'm ready to take the plunge but I'm going to need God's help in doing so. I pray he'll be my feet when I can't walk in the door and my hands when I shake the one extended out to me, the smile to a new face, and the words to ears who might be judging me. God lift me up in this time and carry me because I know I can't do it without you.